Catch-22 | Britni’s Story
I got off the bus at Ashmont station and walked through an empty parking lot. At the other end of the parking lot, where I had to walk to turn onto the street I needed to take, were two men sitting and talking. Knowing that I have no choice but to walk right past these men on a sparsely populated street, my brain starts thinking about how I am going to approach the situation.
- Should I keep my head down, headphones in, and pretend I don’t see them? No, then they might get angry and think I’m a bitch or stuck up or something.
- Should I prepare my bitchiest retort for whatever they throw at me? No, then the situation might escalate.
- Should I smile and say hi? Yes, because why am I even assuming that they are going to harass me in the first place? Isn’t that rather vain of me to think that every man that I pass on the street is going to say something to me or want my attention?
I approach the men and they say hello. I smile and say hi back, adding, “Have a nice day.” Apparently that was the wrong move, because I have now given them the idea that I want to interact with them. One of the guys says to me, “Where are you going?” I put my head down and continue walking away from him. But he doesn’t stop. “Hey, where you going? Can I come with you? Come back here, baby!” For an instant I worry that maybe they’ll follow me home. Luckily, they don’t.
I pass three girls walking in the direction of the men that I just passed and I hope that they will not have to deal with the same thing that I did.
I’m left feeling like I can’t win. It seems that every choice is the wrong one and they all end the same way: with me dealing with unwanted harassment or attention of some kind.
2 Responses
Author comments are in a darker gray color for you to easily identify the posts author in the comments
Things like this remind me of growing up hearing my male peers talk in such derogatory ways about girls. Wishing I was born in a less fucked up world for myself but especially for my daughter. Gods what she probably has had to put up with that she hasnt told me about..
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, William. We hope we can count on you to support our movement and perhaps even speak up against harassment next time you witness an event.
- Jane